Ugly Girls

To all the females disgruntled with their appearence:

Are you fat, big nosed, beedy eyed, doused in acne, a garden for moles, host of a butt chin, too short, too tall or just flat out ugly? Here's what I have to say to you poor unfortunate souls. "Darn you, you lucky wenches! You've got it made. Get out there and use your power instead of sulking around about the gap between your front teeth. The world is your oyster for goodness sakes!"

1: Ugly girls are normally assumed to be smart.

Okay, honestly how could pretty girls have the time to develop their brains? They spend all of their time flirting and doing their hair, right? Not true, but does that matter? No. Because people think it's sort of, pretty much, the truth. Aka: It's a believed in enough generalization. So right off the bat you are at an advantage to dazzle people with your intellect. If you are not intelligent do not fake that you are. That will blow up in your face and make you look like an idiot, same as anyone else. Intelligence isn't everything, but it wouldn't hurt for you to study up on topics that interest you and become a little more well rounded (Haha pun! Don't take that the wrong way.) Learn and become passionate about something. Some fellows prefer girls that know nothing, and that will be a sparkling ornament to hang on their arm-- a trophy that giggles at everything and says nothing. You are safe from those jerks! Because you probably do know plenty, and you aren't a pretty little doll to drag around. You might be too heavy to drag anyways. All the better for you.

2: You appreciate more things more easily.

The world we live in appreciates beautiful art, delicate melodies, darling puppy dogs. So do you. But it's more effortless for you to also appreciate the unfamiliar, the less popluar, the less stunning, because you know, with more clarity, that it too has great potential.

Story Time: You happen upon an unlovely looking mutt with no collar. The resemblence between the dog's face and your booty is remarkable. And then you remember that your enormous hiny is what cushioned your fall off of the neighbors roof (you were trying to steal their cabel satellite), and saved your life. You take the dog home. You wash him up. He still looks grotesque. But he eats up all the food you drop on the floor, and he becomes a devoted companion and member of the family.

Moral of the story: You appreciate a different method of recieving bargains on your cable.

3: People are attracted to you for you, not your looks.

If a guy is head over heels for you, you don't worry, "Well maybe he just likes me for my face. Maybe he just wants to brag to his friends that he's dating a babe." You really don't agonize over that, do you? No. You know he's genuinely fascinated by YOU.

4: People don't expect you to be as confident and fun.

Errr... excuse me?

Listen.You can use that to your advantage. Blow people away with your personality. Surprise them. By golly, show them and their stereotypes up! Be outgoing and just have fun. Don't care about what you look like. Accept everything about yourself and let your confidence just ooze. Attractive maidens are supposed to be the fun, flirty ones. So if they're not they actually disappoint people. If they are fun they don't surprise anyone. They just filled an expected requirment. Besides, unattractive and goofy looking people have a much easier time becoming hilarious and entertaining. Especially the pudgey ones. It's the chubby jolly factor, and it moves one up in the social ranks, believe it or not. So, you have the advantage, homely ladies.

5: You have less temptaion to be selfish and arrogant.

After getting so many compliments the gorgeous girls can get cocky. Of course not all of them do. Many of them can remain humble and sweet. But how many girls have you seen join the wrong crowd of popular good looking kids and get into trouble? How many girls have we all seen think they are a goddess and should get everything they desire? Yuck, far too many. Ugly girls, be grateful you are less likely to become one of those monsters.

6: You have a secret that pretty girls are oblivious to.

Shh. Don't let any pretty lass understand that once a guy gets to know you and finds out that YOU are the funnest, sweetest creature alive, that you then become a beauty in his eyes. The gorgeous females don't even know you're a threat. Ha!

I'm Marie, and my philosophy is that everything has its up's and down's. But an unattractive physical appearence can definately be one psychedelic blessing!